My Terrible Roommate - Part 1 of 2

When I was hired by America Online in Clark in 2003, I met some guys who eventually became my closest friends in life. Today, some of them have become so busy that we seldom communicate but a few still manage to stay connected. To be fair, let me recognize these guys who continuously amaze me – Juan, Omar, Frank, Joel and Yay. However, even though Tony is not very expressive, he has been with me since September 2006 – we literally live in the same apartment – and that puts him on an entirely different position. I mean, I have spent more time with him, technically. In short, we’ve been through a lot.

In 2006, my two younger brothers and I were renting a small room in Makati until Tony squeezed in. However, due to the inconvenience brought by irkingly abominable bed bugs (surot), we thought of finding a better place.

One evening, I got a text from Tony, asking me if we would consider renting an apartment with his two college friends. Apparently, they already found a unit in Olympia, Makati (Malolos St. corner Zapote Rd.)

Despite my brothers’ hesitation, we moved. After all, the location was great and the apartment was nice.

Now, here is the REAL story.

We left the room in Washington even though we still had 2 months (paid deposit). In short, we wasted that money. Why the rush? Tony’s friend (let’s just call him “Abebot”) needed to move immediately.

Abebot told Tony that he was in dire need of a new place. He had all these appliances, kitchen utensils, cabinets – various stuff. So Tony called me and asked if I could guide Abebot and help him unload all his stuff temporarily in Washington (before we move to Olympia). I directly texted and called Abebot and offered to meet him at the corner of Buendia and Ayala Avenue.

It was already 8:30pm and my work would start at 11pm. I was supposed to be sleeping but I sacrificed my sleep in the name of sincere friendship.

Abebot kept me waiting until 10pm, standing in front of RCBC Tower and when I felt really tired, I called him. He said, “Ay, Rob! Di na pala ako tutuloy sa inyo. May kapatid ako sa Pasay, dito ko na muna ipapakilagak ang aking mga gamit.” I heard no sorry or thanks.

It was okay. I just ignored what happened. I went back to our room, walking from Ayala to Washington.

After a few days, we decided to go straight to the owner’s house in Damarinas Village to sign the contract. Alan (Tony’s other friend), Abebot and I went there. Tony was caught up in a serious problem at work so he could not join us. Abebot’s father was driving a van. Apparently, Abebot was already planning to move his stuff from Pasay to the new apartment that same evening.

After the contract signing, Alan went home to Cavite. Abebot’s father drove straight to Pasay without even asking me whether I had other things to do or not. In short, I was forced to go with them, only to find myself going up and down a long, steep staircase, sweating heavily.

His father even kidded me, “Si Abebot talaga… kunwari may bola pa, di naman nagba-basketball.”

Oh boy! He had all sorts of “abubot”, from cotton buds to facial cream, from ironing board to frying pan and a whole lot more. His things were really heavy, the streets were crowded and the van could not park closer to the apartment.

Abebot had me. I had to do that to be a good friend.

There was still a little space so they decided to pick up some of Tony’s things. I fixed his computer table, packed his bags and collected his dirty clothes. One of my brothers hopped in with two bags of clothes.

I had to rush, prepare to work and minutes later, I was enroute to my office – sleepless and really tired.

The rent was P8500/month. We paid 1 month advance and 2 months deposit for a total of P25500. That’s P4250 x 6 persons.

My brother Daniel, I and Tony gave P4500 each. We were supposed to get back P250 each. That’s P750.

After my shift come morning, I went back to the new apartment. All had gone to work but I could not sleep because they left the things scattered all around. I spent my whole day cleaning up our new house. Finally, around 6pm I was able to rest and sleep.

Now, here is another issue. Abebot texted me saying, “Rob, okay lang ba na binigay ko na lang sa Tatay ko yung tig-P250 nyo? Kasi malayo pa ang inuwian nya.”

I felt annoyed and betrayed. Naisahan na naman kami. But I did not react. I tell you, I’m one of the most patient people you could find. In the name of friendship, I did not make it a big deal.

My brother Manuel sensed that something was wrong. In less than a month, he decided to move out.

Thus, it came down to just 5 guys; Me, Tony, Alan, my brother Daniel and Abebot.

Abebot religiously watches telenovelas (Jewel in the Palace, Dyesebel, Darna, Marimar, Tayong Dalawa, Jumong), Piolo’s concerts, Tagalog movies and showbiz-related shows like SNN. Also, he never dines with us.

On the other hand, the rest of us enjoy watching action and sci-fi movies or TV series and eating together. We really get along and even go for short walks at times.

In fairness, when he is with Tony, his face lights up and he looks really happy. Only when he is with Tony. Wala siyang pakialam sa amin at sa aming mga gamit.

As a Call Center employee, I work at night and sleep during the day. However, when it’s too hot, I wait until about 6pm before I go to bed.

That’s when my dilemma starts. Abebot comes, not minding anyone who badly needs to sleep. He turns the TV on in full volume, walks in and out of the room, turns the light on and off, picks and drops various things noisily and spends about 3 hours every night doing his facial rituals.

Most guys would go home, relax for a few minutes, take a shower for about 10 minutes and be done. But Abebot likes walking around the place while brushing his teeth. He walks around wearing just his stinky-looking underwear and he is really, really noisy. He plays the radio on his cellphone loudly. He closes the plate rack cover abruptly and it really awakens me. And he literally plays with water at the sink.

Little by little, I realized why my brother Manuel moved out. He could not stand the things Abebot did. I am convinced that he is rude, insensitive, inconsiderate, egocentric and heartless.

One late afternoon, I was sleeping. It was hot so my personal electric fan was on. Here came Abebot, grabbed my electric fan, pointed it at him while he was ironing his clothes and did not return it. I woke up when he shut the door, my body sweating all over. That devilish creature!

In more than 3 years, Abebot has never helped clean the apartment. He leaves his garbage near the sink every evening and waits for others to throw the bags out. Of course, I do it most of the time.

When my mother was sick, I would be gone for 2 weeks, 1 month or even longer and when I came back, I would still see the same bags of decaying garbage near the sink!

I tried to post reminders and even cleaning assignments but Abebot never respected or followed them. His rudeness goes down, even beyond Hades.

A rat died in the room but no one bothered to find it. I discovered that it was stuck under Abebot’s mattress and – as usual – he did not care. This Abebot is a real pain in the ass!

One day, Reynon told me that Abebot used my plate and spoon to eat. When I came back, I saw it lying around the sink – gumigitata! I left printed notes to remind everyone that we all have responsibilities in the apartment. Nothing happened. I ended up washing my utensils. From then on, I separated them. I hid them in a small cabinet.

One time, Abebot texted us, saying, “Guys, bumili ako ng electric fan. Magbabayad bawat isa ng P110.”

The thing is, I already have my own eletric fan in the living room, which they also use. Then I discovered that Abebot just did not want to share with them his electric fan. The new electric fan was for the other guys in the room and Abebot shamelessly made the decision without consulting any of us – but charged us with P110/each.

As if karma is indeed true, Abebot’s electric fan broke down just after a few days. Holding his pride, he immediately bought his own air cooler. Of course, he is the only one using it. And again, just 2 weeks before this writing, the air cooler broke down again. Now, he is using the same electric fan that was for us.

The stories about Abebot seem endless. He would hide his water container inside the dirty cabinet under the sink with all those crawling roaches. After a few weeks, he moved it to yet another weird place – inside his laundry basket, covered with his dirty clothes. Very selfish and paranoid! Uniquely demonic by nature.

Abebot would buy a bottle of Joy and a scotch brite and he would definitely charge it to us, including his taxi fare.

The rest of us have never had an issue with money. We would buy stuff for the apartment and we’re cool. That’s it. Wala nang kwentahan. I wish Abebot could see that but obviously he does not.

I pay the Meralco bills but Abebot is often “dedma”. He knows that we are supposed to put in our contributions before the due date but he’s like a king who does not have any responsibilities or obligations. He thinks he is above all rules.

One early morning, I went home and found Abebot watching a TV series on his laptop. As usual, he did not even look at me, as if I did not exist. Fine. But wait, it’s not fine. He unplugged my SmartBro and ruined the files I was downloading and he put an 8-inch box on top of my laptop!

I asked, “Ikaw ba nagtanggal nito?” And he innocently (but gloatingly) replied, “Ay! Para saan ba yan?”

Ang sarap sakalin, batukan at ilampaso sa sahig na puno ng asin, di ba? He works for Smart and he does not know what a SmartBro adapter is??? And did I mention that we have 10 electrical outlets in the living room? Why, of all outlets, did he unplug my laptop?!

That was when I recalled Weird Al’s song “You Don’t Love Me Anymore.” Is the guy (or gay?) simply satanic? What kind of upbringing did he have? Or is he just an isolated idiotic, moronic, psychopathic case?

He is lazy, selfish, uncooperative, weird and uniquely mental. He puts the knife pointed side up. He soaks the electical pot in the water. He sweeps the dirt and leaves it on the doorway. He screams when watching TV. He talks on the phone so loudly without minding others. He plays loud music near a sleeping person (like me). He watches TV in full volume even at midnight and laughs alone. He screams upon seeing a cockroach. Yet, he goes to the gym and owns a basketball even if he does not play the game. Props!

You will know it was him who last used the restroom if you see the pail full of water and soap and a braid of hair is blocking the drain.

He could open a salon with his cabinets full of beauty products. And don’t forget, he buys Piolo and Sam’s CDs, sings (and dances) to the tunes and watches their shows. Add the telenovelas and showbiz-oriented shows he can’t miss.

Alan told me that Abebot has been “wooing” Tony since their college days. Well, I don’t have any comment on that. Maybe, Alan was just joking. Maybe not.

In December 2008, I texted Abebot because he did not give his share on the rent on time. I did not know that he was in Davao with his family. He said, “Sinira mo ang bakasyon ko, nakakawalang-gana, ang aga-aga pa naman.”

He was like a talkative lady market vendor who picks a fight. Then he sent nasty, degrading comments and personally maligned me through text. Di ko sya pinatulan. What did I do? I just reminded the arrogant guy (gay?) about his rent. He was so pathetically embarrassing!

We bought a TV. It is ours. But Abebot fixed it in the room so I could not move it to the living room. Tony realized that it’s not fair with me so he bought an extension cord for the antenna and helped me position the TV in the living room.

Abebot moved the TV back to the room. Kinuha ko uli nung isang araw na naman, tutal wala sila. He moved it back to the room again. Once more, I moved it to the living room one Sunday noontime to watch Manny Pacquiao's boxing fight.

On the third time, he hid the extension cord so I could not find it anymore (although, I found the cord after 5 days, but not the connector) and he threw the box away (the one serving as TV rack). Then, he took the remote and brought it home in Rizal for more than a week!

Tell me, don’t I have the most terrible roommate? He is a certified psycho! I rest my case.